7 Days

Yesterday was my last day of work for the summer. I was the first summer student to leave our department, the other 3 suckers still have a week left, but they had a little going away party for all of us anyway. They got us a cake and me my own mini gluten free cake which was pretty awesome. My job wasn't too exciting but I am nonetheless grateful for the experience that it provided. I am a super passive person with a backbone made of soup, and this job forced me to toughen up and make my backbone more like the consistency of jello. Every opportunity is a chance to learn, maybe I didn't have any super awesome volunteer experiences this summer, but I did learn how to deal with people who are less than happy to hear your voice. People are grumpy and angry all over the world, this summer I learned how to deal with them all day.

I am now in Calgary, and I have 7 days until the MCAT. I am really, really scared. I did another practice exam today, AAMC #5, and I got a 29 :( My Physical Science score went back down to an 8....and I am really disappointed. Usually its physics that gets me, but this time it was chemistry. My Verbal Reasoning score is back up to a 10 (thank goodness!) and I intend to keep it there if not get it higher. And Biological Science is currently at an 11 (yippee!).

I have seven days to learn what ever it is that I don't know in physical science and there is still room for improvement on biosci.

For those of you out there also preparing to take the MCAT in the near but distant future, I wish you luck. We are all in this together, the pursuit of becoming a doctor is not an easy one and it is designed to weed out the weak. This is just the first of many walls that we will have to climb.

"The brick wall isn't there to keep us out, its there to show us how badly we want something." - Randy Pausch

Adventures Through MCAT Land

And were are back to talking about the MCAT...sorry guys, but right now, studying is literally my life. I have these Examkrackers Audio Osmosis on my iPod, so at work I literally listen to physics, chemistry, orgo or bio for the 9 hours that I am at work. I don't know if it helps at all, but I can't bare to waste 9 hours of everyday sitting at a desk NOT STUDYING! So I listen...with the hopes that I will remember something useful.

I wrote another practice MCAT today, did the best I have done in a combined VR and BS score...and the worst I have done in physical sciences. I literally did better a month ago, and that was before I had gotten through all of the chem and physics lectures....

I have two weeks left to pull it all together....

But I have some tips if you are also studying for the MCAT and are looking to do better on verbal reasoning section:

1. Buy the Examkracker verbal reasoning technique book and the 101 verbal book

2. Study form both books, and do the tests in a timed fashion with the Examkracker methods

3. IT IS ALL ABOUT THE MAIN IDEA

4. Pause after you read the passage, close your eyes and formulate a sentence about the main idea, then proceed to the questions

5. Take a 5-10 second break between each passage, just breath and imagine your self doing something that you love. I imagine my self riding my bike

6. Keep practising

I wish you the best of luck! 

Heading off to learn the last lecture in orgo and then review some physics. 

Peace like a river. 

The Circle of Life

As some of you may or may not know, my Grandpa passed away two weeks ago. He had an amazing life, did amazing things for people and ultimately left the world a better place.

Today was his "Celebration of Life," which is basically just a happier version a funeral and sans burial.  My brother and I both spoke, and neither of us cried! We both even managed to make a few people chuckle and few people cry. It was a really great service, and the pastor at my Grandparent's church is simply amazing. It was a bit exhausting though....having to constantly meet people and have them tell me how wonderful he was all day...it was constant reminder that he is gone. I will miss him, but I am trying to remember that this is a time to rejoice in the difference he made in the lives of others rather than a time of mourning.

Yesterday, (Friday) I went to Vancouver to see my surgeon, Dr. B, again for a follow up. He was a bit puzzled by the fact that it is still swollen to the point where you can leave a thumb imprint in my ankle (it literally stays there for 5 minutes...its kinda freaky) and the fact that I have throbbing pain...but overall pleased that my nerve pain is better. He said that it could be possible that the nerve is growing into my bone....great. He is sending a e-mail to Dr. S Mackinnon in St. Louis who first preformed the procedure to see if she knows what might be going on...she is also pretty much my hero.

Dr. B saw that I was studying for the MCAT (I was working through the 1001 MCAT physics questions before my appointment), laughed and said that he can't remember anything from the MCAT because he blocked it from his memory. So...I guess it is that bad...

Racing the Tour de Bowness Crit on Monday morning, wish me luck! (Not crashing would be nice, but this course has some pretty nasty pavement and a hill section.)

Side note: I gave an elderly homeless man on Robson St in down town Vancouver (it is the shopping street of the city) $50. I don't really know why, but I even went back and re-crossed the street to give it to him. I haven't really ever felt compelled to give somebody that much money before for no apparent reason, but I just felt like I really needed to. Maybe it was my Grandpa talking...I don't know.

Peace like a river

Gone? Never?

I don't think I have CRPS...at least I hope I don't, but my pain never really seems to go away. I had one month of relief the first month after the surgery...but while my nerve pain is less (but slowly creeping back) it has been replaced by this deep awful throbbing pain.

Does pain for people like us really ever go away, or is it just something that is going to be a part of my life until I die? I know nobody can answer this question, but I wish they could. I really wish they could.

On a happy note, this is my first post from my new Dell XPS 14! Yeah, I know what you are thinking...why didn't I  buy a Mac? Well, you see consumers of the world, Apple has one of the worst CSR policies on earth. Not too long ago there was a fire at one of their factories in China and people literally burned to death because there were bars on the windows and they couldn't get out. My concious won't let me buy an Apple product...they may be cool, but so is my new Dell...which also happen to come in enviro-friendly bamboo packaging. Way to go Dell!!

Peace like a river.

MCAT Prep + Racing

I raced 2/3 stages of the Rundle Mountain Stage Race this past weekend in Canmore, Alberta. We started off the morning at with a time trial at the Nordic Centre. The race was on their roller ski paths which was amazing because you didn't have to worry about traffic or anything. Unforunately, on Friday I took my bike into get my gears tuned up a bit as they were shifting a bit un-smoothly, put it in the car and didn't ride until Saturday morning before the TT. I don't know what they did to it, but I only had a choice of 3 cogs, middle, top and bottom. Safe to say my TT didn't go well, but when I was able to max out my gearing and put the hammer down, my legs felt strong. It was nice to feel strong again and feel like the power I put into my legs actually gets to the pedals.

In the afternoon was the Crit downtown. It poured for the women's race. I got dropped about half way through, but stuck it out in the pouring rain. There were a lot of crashes, both in my race and all of the other categories. At least 2 bad crashes per race, some had more than 5 guys crashing out. Even though I didn't place very well, my body still felt pretty good and I felt pretty strong. A lot of people after the race told me I was amazing because I pretty much rode half the race by myself in the pouring rain, and I didn't just ride, I rode hard.

Sunday night I went to the Mother Mother concert at the Coca-cola stage at the Calgary Stampede (100 years!) with a friend from high school. It was one crazy mosh pit...and if you know Mother Mother, you know that they are considered an 'alternative band' not a screamo mosh pit crowd surfing kind of band. Anyway, bye the time the concert was over, at least 3 people fell on my from above, I was covered in mud (it poured and the standing area is/was grass) and I had to throw out my shoes. It was fun, but also very, very painful. I can't count the times somebody stepped on my foot wearing cowboy boots, those things should be band from mosh pit like situations...

MCAT? What MCAT? Oh, right, the one I should be studying for instead of doing all of the above activities (including writing this blog). I am so screwed... starting to feel sick to my stomach about it actually.

The Swell

I haven't posted in a while because I have been super busy with that thing called work and that other thing called the MCAT, neither of which I fully enjoy. I have been spending a fair amount of time on my bike and the weather is beginning to look a bit more like summer...which is nice because I had clean my bike 4 times a week there for a while.

I bet you are wondering about my good ol' leg eh? Well, truth be told, so I am and so are my doctors. My whole leg below the knee is swollen and spongy like (yuck) with some nice vascular changes (aka my veins are popping out) and a heck of a lot of pain. Now, I know what you are thinking...I should probably stop riding my bike right? Wrong. Cycling doesn't make the pain any worse or any better, but it keeps the muscle spasms in check and keeps me from going insane, so really I don't see any good reason to stop riding.

I have another appointment with my family doc this week...I have pretty much seen him or his locum every week for the past month. There is something not right about what is going on, after the neuroma resection 2 years ago (almost exactly) I knew something wasn't right and everybody just kept telling me it was fine. Then I almost had a below the knee amputation...I don't want to repeat that, this time I am not settling for "don't worry."

On a completely different note, I almost had a heart attack today (not really, but my heart rate went to about 205). I was out for a ride on my usual 65km route, I was just starting up a bit of a hill when all of a sudden this giant thing ran out of the forest 20 feet in front of me, across the road and into the forest on the other side. That is the first time in a while that I have seen a bear whilst out on my bike. It scared me a lot because it wasn't very big, meaning that mama bear might be around waiting to pounce and I was going up hill with a head wind having only spandex for protection. I live in a rural area (obviously) and bears aren't exactly a new phenomena (I'm really not afraid of them) but today seeing that bear with nobody but lil' me around made me realize how vulnerable I really am on my bike.

Pro tip of the day: Bring bear spray when riding in the BC Rockies.

Summer?

Its not even close to being summer weather here in the Canadian Rockies. It has been raining for the past 2 weeks straight and there are flood warning across the Southern BC/Alberta Rockies. It also snowed in Canmore today for the Iron Maiden XC race, fortunately, I was not racing, but from the pictures, its looked pretty nasty.

All this rain is keeping me from riding outside, which at this point is probably a good thing. My ankle pain has been increasing lately, not nerve pain, but a deep throbbing pain. It is still pretty swollen, and I feel like it should be looking  bit better by now, it has been 6 weeks since the surgery. I tried to get into see my GP...but you know how it is in Canada with the doctor shortage and all. I don't think an appointment in 3 weeks is really going to help me too much.

Also, this whole MCAT studying thing is really starting to get to me. I don't want to study anymore, but this is after all one of the most important tests of my life. Its seems stupid that there is an aptitude test for medicine, just because you know how to answer an obscure question doesn't make you a great doctor. If it did, then we wouldn't have any crappy doctors in N. America...Stupid MCAT, I just want to be a doctor!