To know one life has breathed easier because you have lived. That is to have succeeded. - RW Emerson

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

The Wounded Healer

I am taking a class called "Psychosocial Oncology" and today's lecture was about palliative care. The two instructors giving the lecture were what most people would consider in medicine to have opposing jobs. One had a doctorate and was a member of the spiritual care team, the other was a physician and the director of the acute-intensive palliative care unit. Together, they helped me to redefine my notions of adult palliative care, and I was astounded by their abilities to interconnect their roles. Needless to say, I learned a lot about the process of dying, both from a medical perspective and spiritual one. 

5 things I learned today about dying:

1. 93% of palliative care patients ranked maintaining a sense of humour to the end as one of the most important things
2. 0.5% of people in Oregon choose physician assisted suicide despite it being a readily available option
3. Palliative Care physicians are often more influential and important in the life of a person who is dying than any of their "active treatment" physicians
4. Palliative Care medicine actually involves a lot of "real medicine," its not just about pain control
5. Most people who are dying have little desire to confess their sins or wrongdoings  at the end, people do not consider them to be important to them any more.


When we were discussing the importance of physicians and members of the palliative care team to let down their barriers, show their emotions and connect with patients, this quote was on the slide:

"The doctor is effective only when he himself is affected. Only the wounded physician heals." - Carl Jung

I'm not sure how I have made it almost 21 years now with out ever seeing this quote from Carl Jung. I have been beginning to doubt whether or not I can make other well if I am not entirely free of illness myself. But I now feel again that strong sense of purpose, and what I guess you could label as "my calling" to medicine. I don't believe that everything happens for a reason, but I am grateful that this quote was on the slide today, it was exactly what I needed. Perhaps me being in pain, will allow me to heal somebody that others cannot. 


I will someday be a Wounder Healer.


Monday, October 7, 2013

Still Concussed



My last Medical Monday's post was back in August, and it was about the "little" crash I had at a local bike race.

I still have symptoms of an "acute concussion." I don't quite understand how it can be considered "acute" when it is over 2 months past the date of injury. But I'm not a doctor (yet). I can't ride a bike, or do any form of exercise, and school is more challenging than it should be. (Although, I think I did pretty well on my anatomy peripatetic today.) This is a really bad way to be starting off my final year of undergrad, with applications to finish, scholarships to apply for, 4.0s to maintain, a conference to plan and oh yeah, this thing called an Honour's Thesis.

Its going to be a long semester of headaches, concussion physio (I didn't even know that was a thing, and you think with this being my 6th concussion, somebody would have told me about this by now) and trips to the sport medicine clinic. I have a referral to "complex concussion physiatrist," I didn't even know that was a specialty. (Look all the things I am learning about medicine by having a concussion!!) The not exercising part is the worst because exercises is how I deal with pain, no exercise, worse pain, worse pain, worse grades. Apparently physiatrists have solutions for these kinds of dilemmas? I'm not sure if I will ever race a bike again...but I have other plans if I can't.

I hope you are all having a bettter Medical Monday than I am, one not filled with headaches and cadavers with pins in them and pages of anatomy questions. Now back to studying for the written portion of my anatomy exam which is on Wednesday (don't y'all just miss school??).


This is almost exactly what my concussion looked like (but with a helmet), conveniently thanks to Anatomy class I can identify all the structures in this diagram. Yipee!